


Harrison Osterfield OneShots

by Anya_writes



Series: Harrison Osterfield Oneshots & Imagines [1]
Category: Harrison Osterfield - Fandom, Haz Osterfield - Fandom, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-01
Updated: 2020-09-27
Packaged: 2021-03-02 17:41:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 22,857
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24490708
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anya_writes/pseuds/Anya_writes
Summary: A compilation of all the oneshot on Harrison Osterfield. The scenarios here are completely based on imaginations, take them as they are, as fanfictions to pass time and nothing more. thank you for reading.
Relationships: Harrison Osterfield/Reader
Series: Harrison Osterfield Oneshots & Imagines [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1769161
Kudos: 11





	1. How You Meet

(I do not own Harrison or any other real person mentioned in the writing, this is just a fragment of my imagination)

Warning: Is being drunk a warning??

Summary: you've known Harrison but never met him officially. And you meet me at a house party!

As an introvert being best friends with an extrovert means getting dragged to places you'd never go on your own. Just like that, this specific night you found yourself at a house party of one of your best friend's friends. You were not exactly the stereotypical awkward extrovert, just someone who liked her own company more than other people. This is why being surrounded by so many people was a little unsettling, but you tried to hide it gracefully for the sake of your friend, who was nowhere to be found.

Typical, sighing to yourself, you start towards the kitchen for a refill. The part was pretty cool, the people way cooler. That's what happened when you are BFFs with up and coming actress– you went to parties and saw faces you've only seen on screen.

Walking through the crowds of people, you finally get to the kitchen, get your refill, and stand against the counter for a bit. The kitchen being less crowded than the living room, you decide to stay there for a while, when suddenly you hear someone say

"Now, why is a stunning girl like you hiding in the kitchen?"

The voice belonged to Harrison the best friend of the host of the party, Tom. You've seen him around, he has seen you around, you guys just never officially been introduced, or met!

"Too many people out there Osterfield, too much noise. I like to hear myself think, which I can't do out there"

"Well, I know of a place in this house where no one will bother us if ya know what I mean" he tried to give you winky face but failed miserably.

"Harrison, as attractive as you are, I'll still pass on your suggestion, cause clearly, you are drunk" you laugh, as always finding other people's drunk shenanigans funny.

"No love, I'm maybe a little tipsy, but I know that ya like me." He trailed on, teasing you, "you think I haven't seen your glances towards me all the time, the longing in your eyes? Not to mention, my eyes are exactly of your favorite color." He got closer while saying this, standing so close that you had to tip your head up to look at his face.

Technically, he was not wrong, he was pretty great to look at, with those eyes and face, and he was an amazing person, from what you've heard from your mutual friends. And he was right, the shade of grey-blue of his eyes always made you feel weak in your knees. But were you going to tell him that? Hell to the no.

Trying all the different approaches to his teasing in your mind, you decided that bluntness is the best weapon right now. So you looked him dead in his eyes, the eyes you've slowly started to love, and said, straight on- "so?"

Seeming baffled he goes " so? What do you mean by so?"

"So what if your eyes are of my favorite color? So what if I like you and look at you longingly? What are you gonna do Osterfield?" You smirked. His confused face clearly an indication of your success. "Maybe you're right, maybe you're wrong, but don't forget that at the end of the day, I'm kind of immune to your charm"

He expected you to blush, get squeamish a bit, but he did not expect this. He always liked you because you seemed like a calm peaceful person, he had no idea that you had this kind of fire in you!

"Well, how can you be immune to my charms if you have not experienced it first hand?" He stepped in closer, his face in perfect alignment with yours.

"Cause I too have my own kind of charm you know" you counter, simultaneously noticing how close he is and how easy it is just to close the gap and capture his lips in a kiss. You prayed to the universe that it wasn't obvious that you wanted to kiss him badly.

He laughs, loving your response but at the same time, wanting to tease you a bit more.

"You're pretty sure of your own kind of charm?" He says, "almost too sure don't you think? Are you sure you even have charms??"

You sigh, it was becoming impossible to control yourself from wanting to kiss him, "everyone in this world has their own kind of charm, they just have yet to discover it" you say.

He smiles one of his smiles where the corner of his eyes crinkles up. Dipping his head enough so his forehead is touching yours, he laughs.

"Come on darling, what do I have to do to make you kiss me?"

You smirk a little, wanting to tease him a little now, "hmm, we shall see" with that you slide out from between him and the kitchen counter and walk out smiling ear to ear cause damn, you liked that guy so much, and leaving a smiling Harrison behind, who both loved and hated what just happened. Hated cause he didn't get to kiss you, loved because he always liked girls who can tease back when needed and god you were such a tease. He went out into the party, already his mind made up to ask you out then next morning.


	2. Meeting Monty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You Meet Monty

You've been dating Harrison for quite a few months now. So far it was going great. You guys were so freaking compatible, it was unbelievable. But you still hadn't met Monty.

You were probably more excited to meet Monty than anything. You loved dogs. But your mom never let you have one because of her own sad experiences with pets. "They won't live forever," she used to say, "and when they leave, it'll only hurt you." That was her reason behind never letting you have a pet dog. So you made friends with those people who had dogs, you couldn't help it; you just loved dogs too much.

When Haz told you that he has a dog, you were super excited to meet him. He told you that it was a Springer spaniel, the name was Monty, and he was a good looking boy but had mischievous tendencies. When you asked to meet him, Haz got all serious and went "I don't know if we are at that point of our relationship love." earning him a smack on his shoulder as he broke out in laughter.

So after waiting a while, today was the day. Haz's family is going on a vacation, which means that Haz will bring Monty with him to his and tom's shared apartment and keep him there until his family comes back. You already spent a lot of time in the apartment anyway, courtesy to Tessa. You loved that little princess. In fact, it wasn't hard for Tom to be impressed by you. Once he saw how good you were with Tess, he was sold, and Haz had the blessings of his best friend to date you forever.

You ring the bell with anticipation. People will say that you were probably too excited to meet a dog, but you didn't care. You could already hear the scampering of little feet behind the door, a bark, a little sniffing, and your boyfriend's "No Monts stay, stay here" before the door opens. And there he stands, Haz in all his glory, looking so soft and cuddly in his white sweater.

"Hey babe, come here" he pulls you into a hug as a greeting, not that your mind. But right now, your mind was preoccupied with someone else.

"Where is he??" you ask, making Haz roll his eyes while smiling. He knew how much you loved dogs, and it made you even more adorable to him.

"He is in here," as if right on cue, the little pup runs to where you guys were standing, and tries to make a run for it through the door, to what adventure, only he knows. But as soon as he got closer to you, Haz scoops him up in his arms, and turns to you,

"May I present to you, the most spoiled member of the Osterfield household, Monty Osterfield."

The pup squirms in the arms of its human, you close the door and step into the apartment. Taking Monty from Haz, receiving numerous kisses from the puppy in the process.

"Oi, that's too many kisses, she's my girlfriend," Haz mock gasps at the puppy. You carry the pup into the apartment, giggling at Haz. You let the pup go, who runs off to one of his toys and starts fighting it.

"I love him." You turn to Haz, a huge smile adorning your face. If anything you liked better than dogs, it was guys who were good with dogs. And right now you swore that Haz was the most perfect guy you've ever seen.

"Now now, that is a serious declaration, little lady" Harrison says with mock seriousness. "How long have you known the little rascal anyway?" he broke his character, laughing. "He has never chewed up your shoes."

"Nonsense, this little love can never do that." You crouch down to pet the pup, who evades your attempt and goes straight to Haz, who smirks at you, giving Monty head pats. You gasp, "Come back here and let me love you Monty."

You don't know what the dog thought, but he abandoned his slightly smug human and lay down near you. You lean down and give the puppy a kiss on his head, hearing Haz mutter "traitor" under his breath.

In the afternoon you guys went out for a walk, Monty running before you, only restrained by the leash, you and Haz walking behind the excited puppy, hand in hand enjoying the weather. You guys go to a playground, where Monts is finally released from his leash, and he runs everywhere for a while before you guys start playing fetch. You had to admit that having a dog was better than you imagined. Sure there were responsibilities, but they were worth it, as Monty once again brings the ball to you instead of Haz.

"Hey, I threw the ball; you're supposed to bring it to me." Harrison pouts at the dog, who only wags his tail a little at the pouting boy.

"I think he likes me better than you." You say smugly, reaching down to pat his head.

"I know. It's not fair." Haz says, as he leashes Monty back, you all making your way back to the apartment.

Once you guys get back to the apartment, Haz goes to take a shower while you and Monty get comfortably cuddling on the bed.

"What do ya wanna watch Monts? " you ask the puppy in your arms as you scroll through Netflix. "Lady and the tramp? Bolt? Are you a super dog like Bolt, Monts?" you keep making conversation with the sleepy pup on your lap. You don't even realize when you've strayed to the topic of Harrison.

"I love Haz you know that?" you ask Monty, who at this point is happily snoozing. He is smart and adorable, a hopeless cook, I know, but I love him. Unbeknownst to you, Haz had already finished showering and in fact was standing at the bathroom door, looking and listening to you.

"Are you talking to my dog?" Haz asks, nearly making you jump. You feel warmth creeping up your neck to your cheeks, wondering about how much of your conversation he heard.

"No. I'm not" you deny instantly, making him laugh a little. After changing into sweatpants and a t-shirt, he casually strolls through the room, gets on the bed and grabs your face in his hands, slowly turning you to face him, "It's killing me how cute you are." He kisses you. "But I'm still a little hurt though."

"What? Why? What did I do?" you panic a little, thinking what you may have done to hurt him.

"Well, Monty was the first one to know that you love me. Not me." He pouts a little. You laugh at him.

"Well, Monty was kind of asleep, so I don't think he heard me. So here we go, I love you." you give him a little peck on his lips.

"Good," he says. "Because I love you too, and it would've been really weird if I was the only one to say it tonight." He leans in for another kiss, only to have Monty stand up on the bed and his head got between both your lips.

"MONTY," Haz laughs out, while you try to control your own giggles. The puppy didn't look remorseful at all, rather a little cheeky.

"How about we watch the movie?" you ask, still giggling. Harrison tries to cuddle you. Monty gets on your lap, demanding belly rubs with his adorable eyes. That is how you guys settle in for the night. All three of you, cuddling together, watching Bolt.


	3. To the only boy I love now (feat Noah Centineo)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What happens when your best friend is in town and that gets Harrison jealous? (feat Noah Centineo)

Moving to London was probably the best decision you made. That is where you met Harrison after all. But sometimes, you missed Miami. The sun, the sea, your friends, your home, everything was still etched into your memory like you saw it all yesterday. But you had to leave. 3 years back the breakup that you had almost destroyed you, and the only way you could save yourself was to leave, and leave for good. And the only person, who helped you through it, was in fact coming to visit you after all 3 years.

"So when does this Noah coming?" you instantly detected the note of annoyance in Harrison's voice. You couldn't help but laugh. He was annoyed probably because for the last two weeks, ever since Noah had finally confirmed that he is coming to London, all you had talked about is him, and how you guys grew up together, and how great friends you are. Now, Haz is not one of the jealous ones. He doesn't mind if you hang out with Holland boys and the extended friend's group without him. But anyone he didn't know personally caused him to get all protective and a tiny bit jealous.

Putting on the last touches on your makeup, you reply "His flight lands at three. He is going to the hotel from there, and we are going to meet him at the pub for drinks around six. So you better get ready." Hearing some incoherent mumbling from the grumpy boy behind you, you add "Or I can go alone if you don't feel like it"

"No way am I letting you go alone. And why do you even have to put on makeup, you're pretty without all those on your face."

"Well, thank you for the confirmation of the already known fact!" you couldn't help but laugh. "But I still don't feel like going out looking like a sea troll."

"Baby you make a very sexy sea troll." Haz joked with you. And this is probably his favorite thing about you. You were just so comfortable with the way you were. Easily joking around about the way you looked.

Meeting Noah was something he was dreading for two weeks. He knew that you guy grown up together, and at the toughest point of your life, He had helped you the most. But he still didn't know the guy. And he never trusted guys he didn't know around you. You were one of the best people in his life, and he was constantly afraid that you'll find someone better and lave him. This coupled with the anxiety caused by the knowledge that you valued Noah's opinion so much and if Noah didn't like him then you may break up with him made him feel antsy. And he didn't like feeling antsy.

"Alright, I'm going to get a few things from the store, and when I come back we'll leave for the pub okay?" you asked Haz, whose head was apparently lost in clouds.

Snapping back to reality, he looked at you and gave you his smile, the one where his entire face lights up and you feel like the sun is shining even if it is midnight. "Yeah okay. Just come back soon alright?" he wraps his arms around your waist and leans down to kiss you, "I'll miss you," he mumbles against your lips. Shaking your head, you kiss him one more time before going out the door.

The pub was pretty crowded when you got there. Noah had already texted that he might be a little lat. So you and Haz found a spot, getting some drinks.

"How come your perfect Noah is late?" Haz asks you, trying to sound nonchalant.

"Oh god, here we go," you think to yourself. "He is jet-lagged, he fell asleep. It happens to you too, baby."

"Exactly why I never set any meetings on the day I'm flying in. Your friend didn't know that?"

"He is actually very excited to meet you. He's heard a lot about you from me, and yeah, that's why he wanted to meet us today instead of tomorrow. And baby, he is not perfect, that boy has so many flaws. Do you know that when he is eating Oreo, he eats is a cookie and filling separately?"

This makes Harrison laugh out loud. Exactly at that moment, you see a familiar guy with a mop of brown hair stepped into the pub.

"NOAH" you all but run to him, excited to see your best friend for the first time in three years. He picks you up when hugging you. His huge smile reflecting your excitement.

"Hey, have you shrunk?" he pats your head as he always did. "No you idiot, you've grown huge, like a giraffe." You swat his hands away. Not really minding your insult he goes "Meh, I like giraffes. Now, where is this boyfriend of yours?"

This makes you snap out of your daze, you totally spaced out on Haz, bringing Noah to your table, you notice Haz had gone very quiet, trying to hide his annoyance, but you know him too well.

"Noah, this is Harrison, Harrison, this is Noah." You make the preliminary introduction, praying to all the gods out there to make them like each other.

"hey." Haz says, once again trying to appear nonchalant.

"Hey man, I have to tell you, I am super psyched to meet you. I've heard so much about you." Noah went on in is familiar "I-am-going-befriend-everyone" way.

"Yeah, I hadn't really heard about you." You wince slightly at Harrison's reply. Hoping to god that Noah doesn't get offended.

"Well, with good reasons. I have not been able to really keep in touch with this one for some time" he pinches your cheek, a gesture that probably makes Haz even more jealous. "I've been a bit busy."

"Busy becoming a movie star." You take control of the conversation. After that, you guys talk for a while, mostly you and Noah, Harrison making snide remarks once in a while. After a little, Haz excuses himself to get a refill, and that is when Noah turns to you,

"He is jealous isn't he?"

"Yeah" you reply sadly, looking at the back of Haz. "He just gets a little jealous whenever we are hanging out with guys he doesn't personally know."

"Alright," Noah takes a sip of his beer, "how about when he comes back, you go to the washroom to fix your make up or open the chamber of secrets, whatever it is you girls do," this earns him a heavy slap on the back of his head from you "Ow that hurts. Anyways, and I'll talk to him."

"Do not mess this up for me Noah. I really like Harrison."

"Yeah, I got that from the way you've been making heart eyes at him all night."

After Haz comes back you excuse yourself to the washroom as planned, hoping whatever Noah is planning goes well.

Sitting at a table with a guy Harrison wanted to hate was not easy for him. For the most part of the evening, Haz had looked for things he could hate about Noah. But he didn't find any. The guy is really friendly, and damn he is tall. Haz felt a little weirded out that he was noticing these things about a guy. But all in all, Noah seemed to be pretty cool, making it harder for Haz to hate him.

"So man listen," Noah begins, Haz prepares himself for another snide comment. "I don't know if it is right of me to say, but I've always thought of her as my best friend and seen her hurt too many times, so just take care of her okay?" Noah said with all sincerity. "She has always made terrible choices when it comes to guys, but seems like this time she actually made the right one, you know, with you"

How can he hate Noah after this? Haz clears his voice, "yeah, I am very lucky to have her as well. And if I am, to be honest, I was a little jealous about the way she talked about you, you know."

Noah couldn't help but laugh at that, "Yeah well, you should hear how she talks about you. In fact, I have some recordings you can listen." You decide to return to the table right at that moment

"No one is going to listen to any recordings," you say, blushing a little. Haz just smiles up to you.

"I'm really sorry I acted like a dick all this time."

"Aww, it's alright babe, you're adorable when you're mad. Or jealous, mad, or jealous." You laugh.

"Look at you both; you make me believe in love again" Noah fake cries from the other side of the table.

"Shut up you dork" you laugh again. Happy that the two guys were getting along.

"So Harrison, my good old friend, tell me what she says about me?"

You look at both of them Haz laughing, and Noah offering you a sly smile "oh when did you guys become a good old friend."

"Fifteen minutes ago, not shut up, I'm talking to my good old friend here."

"Well she was telling me something about your Oreo eating habits," Haz says, shooting a mischievous smile towards you. You guys stay there late into the night, laughing and talking. You were so happy to see the two boys became good friends.

After you guys said your goodbyes, the boys making plans to meet again the next day, without you, because they had "guy things" to discuss, as put by Noah. You guys come home and get into bed. You couldn't help but tell Haz "you've no idea how happy it made me see you and Noah get along. It's like the best day of my life."

Haz laughed, "Yeah, he's a cool guy. I like him."

"Well, don't like him too much. He is my best friend."

"Is it now," Haz teased. "Who knows, maybe by the time he leaves for Florida, he will become my best friend"

"Alright then, we will see." You say, hitting Haz square on the face with a pillow, starting a pillow fight at 3 in the morning.


	4. Hard To Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> warning: mention of depression. don't read if it is a trigger for you.
> 
> What happens when the thoughts of how you can't be loved creeps in your mind??

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning: mention of depression. don't read if it is a trigger for you.

It wasn't easy. There were days you were perfectly happy. There were days you'd feel invincible, like you could take on anything life threw at you. There were days you'll wake up in the morning and feel nothing but love and pride for your own self. But those days scared you. Because you knew that just like a sunny sky, these days never last. There were also days when you felt like nothing matters, like you don't matter. You imagined that world will be a better place without you in it. Those were the bad days for you. They weighed on you, bringing you down.

You were having one of those bad days today. Nothing had gone right. You were late to office; you spilled your coffee, your best friend bailed on your plans for lunch. All you wanted to do was to go home and get to sleep, eager to get this day over with. Coming home you saw the lights already on in the living room, which only meant your room mate, Harrison was home. He had been away for quite some time, busy with filming. It's been only 4 months since you guys started to share an apartment, and he clearly didn't know about your bad days. Determined to keep it that way, you put a smile on your face and entered the living room, instantly being enveloped in a warm hug.

"Hello darling, how have you been?" you laugh at his cheeky greeting. He always had a way to make you laugh and smile. You missed him when he was gone. But now that he was here, all you could think about is if he will ever miss you if you were gone.

"Haz, how was Paris?"

"Ah, same old you know." He let go of you. Looking at your face he instantly knew something was wrong. But he also knew you wouldn't tell him. That is how you were, never telling anyone anything, never wanting to bother anyone. So he never forced you. But he realized that something was extremely wrong today. Your fake smile seemed extra fake, and it seemed like you were about to burst into tears any moment. "Well, now that I'm home how about we order pizza and watch movies?"

You wanted to, you really did. But the self destructive part of your brain told you not to, so you replied "I don't actually feel that good today. You don't mind if I just go to bed right?"

"No it's fine. Are you alright though?" concern coloured his voice. You assure him that everything is fine and went up to your room. Quickly changing into comfortable clothing, you braced yourself for the night. It was worse time of the day for you when the bad days came. It was just hours and hours of negative thoughts that you had to fight, some days feeling so weak and tired that you didn't even see the point. But you fought, always. Not because you wanted to live, but because you were afraid to die.

And soon it started, slowly and surely, the thoughts started to creep in. Today everything seemed to be revolving around your fear of being unloved all your life. You kept analyzing every relationship you had with everyone in your life and every time kept reaching to the conclusion that no one really loved you. This kept happening. All you could think about was how you'll probably be alone for the rest of your life. All the while you didn't realize that you had started to cry louder, only realizing it when you hear the door open and hear Harrison coming in, holding you and telling you that it'll be alright that it'll be fine. Lies, you thought, all of them are lies. You pulled yourself free from him, yelling how it will never be okay

"It'll be fine, just look at me, it'll be alright."

"No it won't, it never is. And you'll never understand." You sob, "When was the last time you felt loved, Harrison? Because I can't remember the last time I felt like someone loved me. I don't remember. I don't feel like anyone can love me, i don't feel like I can make anyone love me. I am just me, why'll anyone ever love me?"

Harrison didn't know how to explain it all to you. "Listen to me," he held your face in his hands, "the last time I felt loved is when you baked that cake for me on my birthday, remember that? You didn't know how to bake anything, hell, you don't even know how to cook, but you risked burning down the house just so you could do that for me, when you took care of me when I was sick, that's when I felt loved. When you laugh at my jokes that is when I feel loved." He sighs, "And I don't know other people. But you make me love you just by being yourself. The good, the bad the everything. You make me love you with everything you do. And that is a fact. And no matter what anyone says, what your mind tells you, it is a fact. And facts don't change. At least not this one"

His words had calmed you down enough to actually understand what he was saying. He had said that he loved you, something you wanted to hear for a long time. "How can you love me if I'm so fucked in my mind?"

"I don't care, I'm here for you, and I love you. "

Even though the whispers were still there, they started to thin out. You knew that for now, the day was over. You knew that it'll come back, and when it did, all you'll have to remember is that you are loved. No matter what, there will always be people in this world who'll love you.


	5. At What Cost?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> warning: mentions of abortion, miscarriage. do not read if these are trigger for you
> 
> I'm not really good at summaries. Just imagine major pain and angst. Also, read up on the warnings if they are triggers then do not proceed forward.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning: mentions of abortion, miscarriage. do not read if these are trigger for you.

warning: mentions of abortion, miscarriage. do not read if these are trigger for you.

It was dangerous, you shouldn't be driving like this, the words kept playing inside your head again and again. Half blinded by tears, you tried to drive as safely as you could. You kept wiping your eyes. Suddenly a car coming from the other side blinds you with its head light. You don't see stop sign in front of you, driving on, until another car crashes right on the driver's side. The car flips around a few times; all the while you hit your head and slowly lose consciousness, remembering why you were driving away in the first place.

"How can you even say that?"

You yell out at the guy standing in front of you, the guy you've dated for three years now. The guy who you loved and thought the world of. But right at this moment all you could think of was how carelessly he suggested abortion without even considering any other options.

"What else do you want me to say?" Harrison tries to explain. "This is not the right time for us to have a baby, you have your career, I am leaving in a couple weeks for the shooting, and you know I can't give this up. You know I won't give this up" he has waited so long for this one chance to prove himself as an actor. Now he finally had the chance of a lifetime and he couldn't let go of this.

You knew he was right. But right now every word he speaks hurts you, like a whip being cracked all over your body. You unconsciously wrap your arms around your stomach, fearing that his mere suggestion will hurt the baby.

The fear of pregnancy started creeping around your mind since the third day you waking up and running to the bathroom, throwing up the contents of your stomach. You kept feeling nauseated, dizzy. To cross out that possibility, you took the test. Having already talked about kids and a possibility of a family with Harrison, you knew what the consequences of a positive test would be. He didn't want kids, not right now. You knew it, but all along the time you were waiting, you couldn't deny the feeling of knowing something is going to go wrong.

The positive test rocked you to your core. To be extra sure, you went to the doctors and took the blood test, hoping against hope that the positive test was faulty. It wasn't.

You didn't know how you were going to tell him, you didn't know how he will react. But you sure as hell, did not expect this.

"Yes I know what you mean, but how could you just suggest abortion without any consideration to other options?" you shoot back, tears welling up in your eyes.

"What other options are there huh? We either have the baby and ruin all our prospect in life, or we get the abortion and go on with our lives." Harrison tries to control his voice, his anger, but he fails, speaking a little too loudly. "Baby, try to understand. It's not that I don't want kids with you," he tries to sooth you now, desperate to make you see his reason "we can have kids later in life, as many as you want, when we have both done things that we have dreamed of doing all this time." He pauses, not knowing what more to say.

"I don't know about the future! All I know is that right now I am standing here, in front of you, pregnant, with your child. And you just want to get rid of it." You seethe out. Some part of your mind wanting to agree with him, but you couldn't do this. Not to your baby, not the baby that was part of you, that was part of him. Every time you even considered his suggestion you just saw a baby boy just like him, dead, in your arms.

Harrison was almost in tears. Anger and tears were all you both felt. Knowing where this entire thing is finally going. He knew that he can't have the responsibility of being a father right now. You knew that you couldn't just get an abortion. The only way to solve this was to go your separate ways. But both of you, being in the state you were in, didn't want to consider it. He didn't want to lose you, and you didn't want to do this without him. Just the thought of going through the pregnancy without him caused you enough pain to double over and cry.

"I can't do this." He leaves, without saying another word, without giving any other explanation; he leaves you there standing in the middle of the room.

The sound of the door closing reverberates through the shared apartment. The place you've made so many memories. It was home, but right now, it felt like the very air inside your home was poisonous. Not able to bear another minute inside it, you leave. Blindly making your way towards the basement garage, getting into a car and driving out. You knew it was dangerous; you shouldn't be driving like this.

Harrison didn't know what to do; he didn't know where to go. All he knew was that he had to get away. He hated to see you in pain. And he knew that right now he was causing you more pain than you've felt in your entire life. He felt panicked, at the prospect of having a baby. He knew that suggesting abortion was wrong. But a selfish part of his mind kept driving him, suggesting it. He knew that there would be many more chances for him to prove himself. He knew that both your family, your friends will help. He knew that it wasn't the end of his career. But it was as if he had lost all control of his words. Finally he left. Knowing if he stays, he would be causing you more pain.

He didn't want to go to Tom; he knew that tom would only point out the glaring mistakes he had made this evening. But he didn't know where else to go.

"You are a dumbass, and an idiot." Tom says, incredulous that his best friend, who he considered to be the most reasonable and level headed person in the world, could make a mistake like this. Yes, it was a mistake to Harrison now. He knew that from the moment he suggested the abortion to the moment he left, it was all a mistake. He should have said that it'll be fine. He should've stayed with you. Even sitting in tom's living room was a mistake he was making. Every moment he was not spending with you was a mistake.

"I know. I know I am the world's most horrible person." He declared. He had no other words.

"If you know that then, what the hell are you still doing here? Go back home, tell her that you're sorry, and that you'll be with her every step of the way." Tom states. Harrison gulps down another sip of whisky. "Alright, you know what, let's go, I'll drive." Tom drags him by his arms. Harrison's feet dragging, afraid that it is too late and you'll never forgive him.

He tries to call you while in the car. All the calls went to voice mail. It's alright, he says to himself. You probably don't want to talk to him.

As soon as the car reaches your apartment building, Harrison gets out of the car and runs to your apartment, not even bothering for the elevator. Opening the door to the empty apartment, his stomach sinks. For some reason he felt like something is wrong. The lights were all on. He tries calling you again, only hearing the faint ringtone of your phone echo through the apartment, from where you left it on the kitchen counter. 

"Where's she?" tom comes in, having the sense of waiting for the elevator rather than running up all the stairs. He looks around the empty apartment, before noticing your phone in Harrison's hand.

"I don't know." Harrison's mind goes onto overdrive, thinking about every possible place you could go. He goes down to the garage to check for your car. Seeing it gone, he starts calling all the people you could've gone to, your friends, family, no one knows what happened, no one could tell you where you are.

The feeling of something wrong was turning into a full blown panic attack for him now. He couldn't imagine something happening to you. And in the back of his mind he kept worrying about the baby, the baby he wanted to have aborted a few hours back.

Hands and feet shaking, he sat there in your living room, while tom made the calls to hospitals. Suddenly his phone chimes up, receiving the call immediately, he calls out your name, but the voice from the other side is not yours.

"Hello is this Harrison Osterfield?" he hears a male voice from the other side of the phone.

"Yes, who is it?"

"I'm speaking from St. Patrick's hospital" just this one sentence was enough to make him faint, "we have one y/n y/l/n here; you were listed as emergency contact. She has had an accident. We need you to come in as soon as you can." The rest of the words spoken by the man fell on deaf ears. As soon as he heard that you were in the hospital and you had an accident, his world fell apart. Thankfully, Tom noticed the entire ordeal and took the phone from Harrison's hands. Getting the address of the hospital, he picks up the stunned boy by his arms one again in the evening and leaves for the hospital.

All Harrison could think of during the drive to the hospital was you. He has never been that religious, but he knew that right now he would pray to every god from every religion in the world if it meant that you'll be alright. He knew how big his mistake was. He didn't want to lose you. He didn't want to lose the baby. He wanted to go back in time, fix the entire mistake. He wanted to go through the pregnancy with you, to see the baby born. But all he could think of right now was a little girl with your eyes, dead in his arms.

Reaching the hospital, he bolts inside the lobby, getting the room no. Form the front desk, he reaches the room in record time, seeing the doctors come out of the room, and he skids into halt in front of them.

"Is she okay?" he could only see you partially through the tiny glass portion of the door.

"Yes she is," the doctor spoke, "I assume you are her boyfriend?"

Harrison nods, too busy trying to get a full look at you. "How about we step into my office, we need to talk a little." The elderly doctor steers Harrison into his office.

Tom walks in a little late, having some trouble at the front desk to get the room number you were in. He sees Harrison sitting against the wall on the floor, opposite to your door.

"Hey man what happened?" the look Harrison gave Tom was enough for him to know that something was terribly, terribly wrong. "Is she okay? What happened to her?" worry colours his voice.

"She is fine, she'll be fine" Harrison croaks out, his voice cracking.

"Then what's wrong?" tom asks, dreading what his best friend was about to tell him.

"We lost the baby." Harrison smiles ruefully. "Rather, she lost the baby. I wanted to have it aborted. Remember?"

Tom knew Harrison since they were kids. He knew how the boy worked trough grief, anger, sadness. But he knew that Harrison is blaming himself.

"Mate it wasn't your fault. It was an accident. No one knew this was going to happen."

"I knew." Harrison says out loud, voicing every thought that ran through his head since the moment the doctor informed him. He felt that it was him who caused it. He felt that the reason something like this happened is because how much he wanted the baby to be gone the first few moments after hearing the news. "It is my fault. I wanted the baby to not exist, and universe gave me what I wanted, decorated on a silver platter."

The nurse comes out of your room, interrupting the conversation. "Honey, are you the boyfriend?" the kind elderly nurse's eyes held nothing but compassion and sadness for the boy sitting on the floor. She has worked too long in the hospital to see a man completely broken down after losing their child. "She is awake, come on darling, up you get, she needs you" she picks Harrison by his hands, giving him gentle push towards the room.

He never knew that entering a room was this hard. He couldn't look at you. But he had to. He knew that he had to face what he believed to be the consequences of his actions. There you were, seemingly unscratched. But the wound was on the inside. The nurses didn't exactly tell you that you lost the baby, but you heard it, coming in and out of consciousness. You wanted to cry out, but for some reason you couldn't. All you wanted was your child back. Even if it meant giving your own life for it.

You knew Harrison was in the room, but you couldn't look at him; you couldn't, because you knew that the moment you'd look at him, you'd know that all the love you had for him will be gone. You wanted to lash out, hurt him in any way possible. To make him pay for what he had done. But you knew it wasn't his fault. He didn't cause the accident. You did, with your careless driving. Right now, all you felt was unlimited hate for on yourself, and him

"I lost the baby" that's all you could manage to say. Looking at the wall in front of you. "Are you happy now? You can go on to become the actor you wanted to be. I can succeed in my career. Every dream we had, I bought it back again, at the price of our unborn baby's life. Are you happy?" you finally look at the guy in front of you. He looked broken, he didn't have any right to look broken, you think to yourself angrily. He wanted this. The rational part of your brain tried to reason, but the grief was too much.

"I'm sorry," his voice was enough to cause you pain. "What do you want me to do? Tell me how to fix this?" he begged you, wanting to fix it, wanting to have you back in your arms again.

"leave." You say, "Leave, and never ever come back. I don't want to see you ever again in my life." That is the only thing that will help you. Or so you thought. Just looking at him was enough to bring to your mind the image of the little boy with blue eyes, the boy that could've been lived. But now he won't anymore. You knew to heal form this you need to forget and you'd never forget with Harrison in your life.

He knew that you hated him. He hated himself. Leaving you would destroy him. Good, he thought. I should be destroyed. So he left. Went out of the room without another word, knowing that nothing will ever rekindle that warmth in your eyes when you looked at him. He didn't only lose you, but he probably lost a chance at the most happiest future he could have. But at what cost? He kept asking himself. At what cost?


	6. Sober Words Of A Drunken Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A drunk heart speaks its sober thoughts. But what happens when it comes to facing the consequences?

It was a nice morning. Which is saying a lot since waking up in the mornings for you is not pleasant. But today it was different, maybe because of the presence of the warmth of someone beside you. You streach and sigh, feeling the boy next to you starting to wake up. 

"Mmm, g'mornin love"

"Good morning" you smile at him, getting up and putting your clothes on. You make your way to the kitchen; Harrison follows you, wrapping his arms around you as you stand in front of the fridge. Turning around, you face him, only for him to put his lips on yours, making you forget everything around you. After a little you reluctantly pull away, so that you can talk about the important stuff.

"We can't tell anyone Haz" you say, feeling his lips slide from your lips to jaw, and from jaw to neck. He keeps up with his ministration there, only giving you a little hmm, adding to all kinds of sensations you are already feeling.

"I'm serious. We can't let our friends know. As great as last night was, it'll still be too weird to just tell everyone that we had a one night stand."

Now he pulls away from your neck, satisfied with the hicky he worked so hard on. "Yes I know, you said this almost a thousand times last night." He rolls his eyes at you fondly. "Also, we can totally turn this into an entire weekend thing you know?" he winks at you. 

"As much as I would like that, I still think we should keep it under a secret."

He sighs, "Fine, whatever you say." He leans in for another kiss but you free yourself from his arms. 

"I need to go Haz," you turn towards the door after picking up your keys and bags. The truth was, the longer you stayed, the more you wanted to stay.

You liked Harrison since your friend introduced you to each other two months ago. Slowly you guys started to hang out by yourself, and you started to like him more. So much that now, there was always a kind of feeling of longing inside your chest that only his presence could ease. But the self doubting and self loathing side of you always made you feel like there is no way that someone like him will ever like you like that. So you kept it all wrapped up and buried in the deepest pit in your heart, sure that if you didn't pay enough attention to those feelings, then you'll stop feeling them altogether. 

But then, last night happened. One moment you guys were sitting together, watching movies, the next kissing each other. You didn't know what was happening and why, but all you knew that it somehow made you feel happy, so you let it happen. Not that you regret anything that happened. What you regretted was that all those feelings you have buried in your heart were pulled back to the surface now. And boy is it going to hurt to bury it all back again.

You go on with your usual routine for the day, coming back home, showering, getting ready for work, but today it was different. Today it took you double the amount of concentration than usual to not think about Harrison. Maybe because usually all you had to stop thinking about was his face, his smile, his adorable dorkishness. But today you also had to distract yourself from the feeling of his hands on your body, his lips on you, how it felt to have him inside you. It took almost all your concentration to just remember where you've kept your phone; the rest of the day was still ahead.

You didn't hear anything from Harrison all day. Which was nothing abnormal, he had quite a packed day today, you knew that. But your over thinking mind kept telling you that it was because he regrets what happened last night. Maybe you shouldn't have done it. Maybe you should've pulled back. Now there was no going back. You've never had a chance with him as your love, now you've lost him as your friend too. All these thoughts kept whirling in your mind all day, making you feel panicked and dizzy. You made so many mistakes and errors on the documents you were working on that your boss chewed up your head, making your already bad day even worse. 

All you wanted to do was to come home and get in bed, watching cartoons and eat Chinese. But your best friend knew something was wrong just by hearing your voice on phone when she called. And she had some other plans for your evening.

Entering your apartment, you saw her in the middle of your living room, all dolled up and ready to party. She had a crazy grin on her face and behind her you could see a few bags on your couch.

"What are you doing here?" 

She laughs. "Listen, I know there is something wrong, which is why I have a plan." She gestures to the bags behind her, "Since I have impeccable taste, and I also know what you like, I took the liberty to go shopping for you, and now I'm going to get you ready and we are going out to have some fun"

You so dearly wanted to stay at home, but her enthusiasm was catching, and it felt like maybe it is a good idea to go out. So you agreed. After 2 hours of your best friend, helping you get ready, which you could easily call torture with makeup and hair brushes, you were out of the door, making your way to the newly opened club in the city, which according to your friend was a 'must-visit' place in the city.

It doesn't matter if a club is new or old; they are all the same, you thought as you entered the club. Little to less light, music so loud that you couldn't hear your own thoughts, it was overwhelming. Especially on a night you wanted for yourself. But now that yu were here, there is no way to turn back. So decide on getting drunk. At least it'll ease the pain you felt in your chest because on Harrison.

Just thinking about him was reason enough for you to make your way towards the bar and order shots. Your friend looked at you worriedly, knowing that you were not a shots kind of girl.

"Are you okay?" she asks gently.

Downing one of the shots, you smile at her "Absolutely peachy. You want to dance?" you ask her, downing the second shot and dragging her over to the dance floor, wanting to lose yourself in the music as well as in the crowd.

The rest of the night continued this way, until you find yourself sitting in front of the bar, your friend flirting it up with a guy, with your encouragement. You had to admit that you were an excellent wing woman when you were tipsy.

But sitting there alone was not helping you. Your mind kept wandering back to Harrison, the alcohol making it hard for you to focus enough to keep your mind engaged in other matters. Once you thought you saw him near the door, but you chalked it up to your imagination and ordered another drink.

"I'll have what she is having"

Great, you thought to yourself, Abso-fucking-lutely great, now I'm hearing him too. You slowly curse yourself, when suddenly you feel someone tapping on your shoulder.

Looking behind, you see a pair of all too familiar blue eyes staring at you. This time you say it out loud "Great, now I'm imagining you standing in front of me."

"You div, I'm really here," Harrison furrows his eyebrows at you. "How drunk are you?" 

"Enough to do this." And with that you wrap your arms around him and kiss him.

Feeling a little stunned, he freezes for a few second, before kissing you back. But he pulls away after a few minutes, remembering that you were probably shitfaced drunk.

"Let's go bub, I'm taking you home." He pulls you off of the barstool you were sitting on.

"Ooh, yes, good idea, maybe we can continue our last night's work, if ya know what I mean" you try to wink at him twice, but in your drunken state, instead of winking, you vocalize it "Wink wink"

He couldn't help but laugh at your drunken shenanigans. He gently pulls you through the crowd, into the night air outside. The drive to your apartment was probably one of the most memorable drive in his life, what with your drunken ramblings. Getting you to your apartment was another challenge, because you wanted to get waffles, and he kept telling you that two thirty am in the morning was not a great time to have waffles. After a lot of persuasion and a final promise to make waffles for you in the morning, he was finally successful in getting you into your bed room. Telling you to sit in your bed, he finds comfortable clothes for you, when he realizes that you have suddenly gone quiet. 

"Hey, what's wrong?" he asks,, setting down a t-shirt and sweats on your bed, he helps you take of your heels.

"Do you like me Harrison?" you ask him, in a somewhat dejected manner.

He looks up at you, smiling, "Of course I do bub"

"No. I don't mean like." You were feeling a bit impatient now, at him or yourself, you didn't know. "I mean you know, LIKE LIKE" you air quote the last bit. "You know, like enough to, like, do what we did last night, and yeah" you lose trail of your thought, feeling very warm all of a sudden, you drop your head in your hands.

Haz sits beside you on your bed quietly for a moment. He thinks about how distracted he was the entire day, just thinking about last night. To be honest, he never really thought that you liked him that way. Last night was something he had only imagined. He never thought that it will be a reality. During the entire time, he was thinking that maybe you'll never love him like he loves you, but if this night is all he gets, then he will take it.

"I do" the quiet words from the boy next to you makes you look up. He was looking at the ground thoughtfully, before he looks up at you. He looked at you like he was seeing you for the first time. "I do LIKE LIKE you." He says. "Last night was, something I have imagined for a long time and honestly, I just, never thought that you liked me like that."

"But I do." You say, finally feeling the fatigue crushing you. Yawning loudly you continue "I like you so much. And the entire day I thought that you don't like me!" your eyelids clearly drooping.

He smiles at your state of sleepiness. "How about we talk about it in the morning? You look like you're ready to crash" he helps you to change clothes and get into bed. 

"You always have the best ideas" you sleepily mumble, making him smile even more.

The next morning, you find yourself waking up with the sun in your face. But this morning was the exact opposite of the last, you thought. The massive headache was making it bad sure, but the fact that the warmth beside you of the guy you love was absent, made you crankier. You were about to fall asleep when suddenly remember Harrison and the conversation you had last night. That makes you sit up straight in your bed, making you instantly regret your decision. While trying to remember what exactly were said, you smell something burning.

"What the fuck?" you make your way to the kitchen as quickly as you could, without making yourself faint, only to find Harrison standing by the waffle iron, looking morosely at the burning mess. 

"Harrison, what are you doing here?" 

Hearing your voice, he snaps his head at you. "I promised you that I'll make you waffles. But I think I burned them" he looks at the burned mess sadly once again. "Will you settle for pancakes?" he looks at you with puppy dog eyes.

Feeling a shit eating grin coming on your face you nod. You make your way to the kitchen counters and hop up on one of them. 

"So, about last night." You begin, with him looking at you "The memories are a bit fuzzy, but I think I said I like you?"

"Yepp" he smirks.

"Oh god!" you hide your face with your hands. 

"Hey," he takes your hands away from your face. "You have nothing to be embarrassed about. Because I like you too" he smiles at you.

"You what?"

"Yeah, I like you too. I just always thought that you didn't like me" he confesses.

"But I do" you say bewildered. "I like you so much"

"Good to know that. Because I like you a lot." he kisses you. The kiss would've gone on for a while, if your stomach didn't decide to growl at that exact moment.

"Umm, Harrison, I think I need the pancakes" you laugh, a little embarrassed.

"Pancakes coming right up." He laughs into the kiss, letting go of you to make the pancakes that should've been waffles. 


	7. Wardrobe Management

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's a matter of shirts and hoodies.

"Babe, you need to go shopping. We need more shirts."

"Excuse me?" Harrison looked baffled at your statement. He couldn't believe that you'll walk into his kitchen, wearing his shirt, and tell him that he needs to go shopping not because he needed more shirts, but you guys needed more shirts.

"You need more shirts, you don't have many." You say, opening the fridge to get the milk. Pouring it over your breakfast cereal, you take hop up on the kitchen counter and start eating, that's when you realize Haz is looking at you.

"I don't need more shirts, I have plenty."

"No you don't. You have like, 2 shirts in your closet."

Haz sighs, "Because the rest are in your apartment. You never return them." he ignores your look of utter surprise and goes on to put his bowl and spoon in the sink.

"I always return your shirts." You say. Even though you knew that wasn't the case, but you were not going to admit it to him. 

"You want to bet?" Harrison turns to you, with a mischievous smile. He moves closer until he is standing between your legs. "I say, if we go to your flat, we will find at least 10 shirts of mine. Not including the numerous hoodies you've taken from me." He whispers in your ear.

You try to keep on a poker face, but the sudden feeling of warmth on your face and neck told you that you were blushing madly. You do have lot of his clothes in your closet, all of which you've worn at some point, but forgot to return it.

"The fact that your face is as red as a tomato proves that I'm right." Haz laughs against your cheek. 

"it's not my fault that your hoodies are so warm and comfy." You mumble. "But i don't have any of your shirts at my place. Only hoodies." Seeing him quirk one of his eyebrows at you, you add "and two sweaters, okay and a couple of t-shirts. But no shirts. I rarely wear your shirts."

Hearing you say that he only looks at your body, which was in fact, adorned by his red flannel shirt. Feeling the blush on your face intensify, you say "only this one. I don't have any other shirts."

"Alright, we can go and see." He pulls you down from the kitchen counter gently by your hands. You guys make your way to your apartment. Pulling your keys from your purse, you turn to him ask ask, "What happens if there are no shirts on my apartment and you turn out to be wrong?"

"Well, let me think." Harrison makes a serious thinking face, making you laugh. "If you win, you can wear any of my clothes, whenever you want. But if I win, you don't get to wear my shirts anymore."

You quickly get to searching through your closet, realizing that probably more than half his closet was in your apartment. You had so many of his sweaters and hoodies at your place that you wondered what he wears when he gets cold, which made you feel guilty. Soon enough you hear Harrisons victorious exclamation "ah hah! so that's where the shirt went."

The item in question was a blue shirt of his. You remember wearing it after a particularly fun night you guys had, in which he had destroyed all buttons of your own shirt, so you had to wear this shirt when you returned home. You were supposed to return it, but you loved the colour. Bonus, it smelled like him.

"Okay, only this one, but you won't find anymore?"

10 minutes later, you wished that you hadn't said it. There were now 5 of Harrisons shirt on your bed, and you guys were not even half way through your closet. After 30 minutes of thorough searching, the final count was 11 shirts, 5 hoodies, 4 sweaters, and 5 t-shirts, and one boxer. 

"Do not ask questions about the boxer." You pleaded to him. You felt so guilty for hoarding his clothes like this. Sure you liked his clothes, but this was a bit too much you thought.

"I'm so sorry I hoarded all your clothes like this. You should take them." you look at Haz. 

"Okay, but why do you look like you kicked a puppy and just realized what you did?" Harrison takes a seat on your bed, patting the space beside him. You crawl over and sit beside him, only to be pulled flush against his side, his arms wrapping around your shoulders.

"Well, because, I feel bad." You peak at him. "I've hoarding all your clothes, and I know that I would get really irritated if someone did that to me. But you never said anything." You ramble on.

"Woh! Hold on. First of all, I'm not mad." Haz declares, pulling your face up a little. "Secondly, you look better in my clothes." He adds, giving you a little peck on the lips. "And thirdly, this entire thing" he gestures at the pile of clothes on your bed, "Has a simple little solution."

"What solution is that?"

"Move in with me." He says simply, making your eyes go wide.

"Are you sure?" it seemed like a huge step for you. Sure you guys have been dating for a long time, and most nights you guys spent at each other's place, but moving in seems like a huge step forward for you.

"Well, yeah. I mean," he seemed a bit flustered, "we've been dating for a while now. And we spend most night at either your place or mine anyways. It just seems logical. Doesn't it?"

"I guess." You started thinking about the possibilities. You had to admit, you liked the idea. "Okay, let's do it." You agree with a smile on your face.

"But wait, you didn't hear the most compelling argument I have." Harrison says, pouting a little.

"And what is your most compelling argument?"

"If we move in together, you would not have to hoard away my clothes in your closet. They'll be in our closet." He says, putting more emphasis on the word 'our'.

You could only laugh at his argument. "Well, now I'm definitely sold on the idea. Let's do this." You wrap your arms around his neck and kiss him. Suddenly you pull back and look at him.

"Wait, but I was wrong. Does that mean I can't wear your shirts anymore?"

He frowned in confusion, "What in the world are you even talking about?"

"Before we started searching, you said that if you were right and I had more than 10 of your shirts in my closet then I won't be able to wear then anymore."

"Babe, I was kidding." He laughs. "You can wear any of my shirts whenever you want. I like them better on you than myself." Making you feel relieved. "Though I have some questions regarding my boxer and why it is in your closet?"

"Alright, so let's kiss now." You say quickly and kiss him back, making him laugh into the kiss. you guys end up having a full blown make out session on the pile of his clothes, all debates about the clothes management forgotten.


	8. Sick and alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You're sick and alone, that worries haz

"Guys, I'm worried, she hasn't texted me back" Harrison says to the guys, who were too engrossed in the game of fifa to pay him any attention. "Guys, GUYS? Help a bro out here would you?" Haz yells, finally getting the attention of the guys in front of him.

Harry finally pauses the game "Haz, it's not like we don't want to help you, but what do you want us to do man? You didn't give us any details about the date, how it went. Give us something" Haz rolls his eyes at the guy's obvious attempt on fishing for details.

"Hang on; what are we talking about here?" Connor asks, seemingly obvious.

"Our dear Harrison here went on a date on Thursday night. And now he is panicking because the girl is not receiving his calls or replying to his texts." Tom explains the entire matter with a flourish.

"Maybe she doesn't like you; maybe she didn't like the date?" Connor offers the solutions.

Harry snickers at the suggestions. Harrison shoots the guy death glare. "It's not that. If she didn't like me, she wouldn't have gone on four dates with me, and she is the one who planned the last date and it went smoothly. And she was replying to all my texts, and I even talked to her on the phone Friday night. But from Saturday morning, nothing. She is completely off the grid. What should I do?"

"Go to her house then! See if something is wrong." Haz had to admit that he too had thought of what Connor suggested. But it still seemed too soon for that.

"Alright, you know what?" Tom got up and took Haz's phone from him, "You're over thinking this. Just forget about it, play a game of fifa with us, and then we will see what happens. Just chill man" taking his advice Haz follows him to the couch.

After three games of fifa, he finally remembers his earlier dilemma about the calls and texts. "Tom, give me my phone." Taking back his phone he checks for texts, but he finds a voice mail.

"Hey Harrison," you say, "I'm so sorry that I didn't receive your calls or reply to your texts. I just have a fever and headache and cold so I was pretty out of it and didn't check my phone. I swear I'm not ignoring you, I was just sick so yeah, sorry."

Hearing the voice mail was enough for him to put on his jacket and go out to the car, simultaneously dialling your number.

"Hey," you receive his call, feeling a little relieved that he didn't decide on just moving on.

"Hey, are you okay? What happened? How did you get a cold?" he sounded worried.

"I guess I just ate too much ice crème. So I got a cold, and cold invited its two friends, fever and headache." You laugh, trying to lighten the situation, and making sure that he doesn't hear how ill you felt from your voice.

"Okay, I'm coming over" you could hear the car in the background. "No you're absolutely not coming over" you all but yell into your phone. Not only you felt ill, but you looked horrible, your flat was a mess, and you definitely did not want him to come to your flat for the first time and see it messy "Really Haz I can handle it. My fever is down and I don't really have that much of a headache, you don't need to come over" you plead.

"Too late, I'm already at the medicine store; I'll pick up a few things and come over." He says in a determined voice. Realizing it's no use trying to talk him out of it you give up "Spare key is under the doormat, let yourself in."

"I'll be there in thirty minutes. See you" you hear the line go dead. You wanted to clean up the mess a little and make yourself presentable, but you couldn't, killer headache and tiredness from being so sick made you want to curl up in a ball, so that's what you did, not even realizing that you were about to fall asleep.

"Hey babe, wake up."

You wake to someone slowly calling your name. Opening your eyes, you stare at the blue ones staring right at you. You groan and shove your face deeper into the pillows, "Not so close Haz, you'll fall sick too."

Chuckling to himself, he helps you sit up, your entire body protesting against the action. "Here, I got you soup, just eat it and then you have to take your meds, then you can sleep again." Harrison directs you.

"You really didn't have to come over you know." You say, taking the bowl from his hands.

"If I hadn't come over, then I wouldn't know that all the medicine you took was a few Advil. I'd also not know that you were burning up. Because you wouldn't tell me." He picks up some stray clothes from your bedroom floor and puts them away. "You could've called me when you felt ill you know." He says, taking a seat right beside you on the bed. You say nothing, choosing to look into the depths of the soup bowl, as if it contained the secrets of universe. "Why didn't you call me?"

Taking a deep breath you begin "well, the reason is three fold, you sure you want to hear?" you ask, hoping that he'll say no, but of course, when do you ever get what you want.

"Yes, I want to hear them."

"Alright, well, firstly, um, sometimes when I fall sick, I completely go out of it, like stay unconscious for day, or day and a half, before coming back again. But only sometimes, not all the time." You add quickly, seeing him getting more worried. "It only happens once in a blue moon." You try to assure him. "Secondly, and it is kind of a problem with me, I just don't like asking for help." You peek at him, scared now that you were revealing a part of yourself to him. "I just want to do things by myself, and it has backfired on me more than once, but I am too stubborn to learn my lessons, so yea, that's why."

"And the third reason?"

"It's just, we have only been on four dates." You start mumbling, hoping he would not catch it, "And I just didn't think I could call you on such a small thing, you know, I just didn't think we were there yet." You squirm around a bit, sensing his intense stare.

He lets out a deep sigh. "I don't even know where to begin." Hearing this, your shoulders slump down.

"I know, I'm just weird. You can leave if you want to." You say, even though you didn't really want him to leave.

"Don't be stupid. I don't want to leave. Just, what if it was more serious?" he asks, "What if it was something really serious and you needed to be admitted to hospital, only you wouldn't be, cause you didn't tell me that you were coming down with cold, before it got serious? Did you even think of that? His voice a mixture of anger and exasperation, making you feel guilty, but at the same time, a bit warm and fuzzy on the inside.

"Second of all, I don't know what to tell you, but you can always ask for help. It does not make you weak. You can always reach out to people and ask for help, you don't have to do everything all by yourself." He says, trying to sooth you. "And about the third reason, well, we have to start getting there some time don't we? So why not now?" he finishes, taking the now empty bowl from your hand and taking it to the kitchen. Coming back he hands you your meds, "Here you go," handing you a glass of water, "Take your meds, go to sleep, and get better soon. Otherwise I can't take you to that fifth date." He smiles cheekily at you. You couldn't help but let out a laugh at him flirting with you even when you felt like death. You take the meds and go to sleep, hearing Haz hum you a song under his breath. Right before you slipped into sleepy unconsciousness, you ask him, "Would you be here when I wake up?"

"Of course love, I'm not leaving. I'll be here."


	9. Prank wars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who'll win the war of wits?

GUYS, SERIOUSLY?" you yell in the shower. The yell was justified though, because while trying to shampoo your hair, you discovered that the bottle contained not shampoo but toothpaste.

Most of the time living with the guys was great. When Harrison started to look for apartments so that you two could move in together, Tom had literally begged him to stay and suggested the idea of you moving in with them. At that time you didn't think much of it, because over the course of one year you've been dating Harrison, you actually became fast friends with both Tom and his brother Harry. However, in hindsight, you should've thought about the consequences of moving in an apartment with three guys, who were always in the middle of a prank war.

At the beginning it was cute. But now it was infuriating. Especially after the horrible day you've had. All you wanted to do was take a long shower and go to bed, preferably cuddled with your boyfriend. But now you have a hair full of toothpaste, and a boy to murder.

Quickly rinsing out your hair and getting dressed, you storm into the living room, there sits the culprit. You knew it couldn't be Harrison, because the toothpaste was in his shampoo bottle, and it had to be either Tom or Harry. Both of them were in the kitchen, head bent over something. You walk up to them, take hold of their ears, and drag them to the living room.

"Which of you idiots put toothpaste in Harrison's shampoo bottle?" you let go of their ears.

Rubbing his ears tom says "what the hell are you talking about? Why will I put toothpaste in shampoo bottle? That's stupid."

"Yeah, that's so idiotic" Harry added. The notes of disappointment clear in his voice. "Why were you using Harrison's shampoo anyways? "

"Because I ran out of mine. And I know that you put the toothpaste in the bottle." You say, his self satisfied grin confirming your doubts. That little shit.

This is exactly the moment Harrison decided to enter the apartment. Taking in the scene in front of him he knew something interesting had happened. Taking off his coat he laughs, "What is going on?"

"Harry put toothpaste in your shampoo bottle and I put it on my head and now I smell like a mint plant."

"wow, going after my hair, Harry? That's low, even for you. I mean I know that I have better hair than you, but you just confirmed it man." He laughs out loud, finding the entire thing to be extremely funny.

"Um, excuse me, but what about the actual victim standing right here?" you wave your hand around, hoping that at least one of them will apologize.

"Oh come on, you're just a collateral damage." Tom pipes in. Someplace in your heart knows he is joking, but your incredibly competitive and vengeful sight looks at the comment like an interesting idea that they were going to capitalize on.

"baby, come here," Harrison envelops you in a warm hug. "I'm so sorry you got caught up in it but this is kind of a war baby. A war I intend on winning. I'm really sorry, but you helped me dodge a bullet."

You realized that you can't reason with them like this, if you wanted them to stop, you'd have to speak to them in their language. So you give up for now. And make them think that you have nothing more to say on this, while already planning your next move.

3days later:

You hear the door bang shut.

"Where are those idiots?" tom asks you, apparently livid.

"Haz is sleeping. And harry is in his room" you reply.

"HAZ, HARRY, come to the living room." Harry comes in instantly, looking quite angry. Harrison stumbles in a few minutes later, "alright, which one of you assholes messed with my glasses?" he sports a pair of red framed spectacles with reindeer antlers attached to them.

"You look good haz, very festive." Harry laughs out, ignoring haz's glare. "Now will you tell us why you called us?" harry turns to tom. "I have some serious work to do."

"Which of you dumbasses printed out pamphlets for kazoo playing classes with my number?

"What? What the fuck are you talking about? Kazoo instructor?" Harrison seems bewildered. Harry chocking on his laughter, "damn brother, you didn't tell me that you were looking for a career change?"

"Shut up harry, I am serious. I got 24 calls from people who are looking for a kazoo instructor called Dominic dopantson."

"Well it wasn't me. That I know, but seriously who the fuck replaced my glasses with this monstrosity?"

Tom and Harrison now both turn their pointed stares towards harry. "What? Why are you guys looking at me like that?"

Tom explains, "Well, we are the only ones who are complaining about something. You on the other hand seem quite unharmed, because nothing apparently happened to you. So it seems like you are the one who played these pranks on us."

"Well, I don't care what it seems like. I've had something happen to me as well." Harry snapped. "One of you idiots thought it'll be funny to insert an image of john mulany to every landscape shot I took in Australia. For the last two hours I've been trying to edit them, do you have any idea how hard of a work it is?"

"Dude, I don't know who did that, but it wasn't me. You know that I'm not that good at editing pictures" Harrison confesses.

"Well someone did and I need answers, Tom, tell me, was it you?

"Does it really look like I have the time to do that?"

Their banter was probably the most entertainment you've had in the last month or so. You couldn't help but snort at their fight. What you didn't assume is that Harry will catch your laugh.

"You did it" harry gasped, "it was you, it was all you!!!" he seemed scared, awed and very angry at the same time.

"Well someone needed to teach you guys how it felt to be seriously pranked on." You retorted, still highly amused.

"So you gave out my number to strangers for the sake of a prank?"

"No you idiot" it seemed like the time to explain what you really did. "I printed out pamphlets for a kazoo instructor but with a different number, and I redirected all calls form that number to your number. The pamphlet you saw was the only one with your number on, and I made sure that it was my friend who showed you the pamphlet. No stranger has your number. I'm not that callous."

"What about my glasses? and my contacts, what did you do to them?" Harrison seemed nearly panicked at the prospect of wearing the reindeer specs.

"They are safe in my underwear drawers. Seriously baby you're not observant at all."

"And my photos? Are they gone too?" harry inquires.

"Harry, my principle when it comes to pranking is - confuse, don't abuse. I took back up of all your photos before editing them."

All boys seemed relived, yet at the same time very confused at the whole incident. They didn't know what to do.

You get up from the couch, stretching your body like a well rested cat. "Now, stop with this prank war of yours, or there is more where these came from". You leave the room. Hoping the guys will stop with their prank war after this.

You hear Harrison enter the bedroom right behind you. Going into the closet, you retrieve his glasses and contacts for him. Putting on his real glasses, he pulls you in a hug and mumbles in your ear, "I had no idea you could be so fucking devious."

"Well, you kind of pissed me off after you called me a collateral damage in your prank war, i had to do something." You retort, feeling him smile against your temple.

"Ah, I should apologize for that. I didn't think you'll come after all of us with such vengeance, love."

"What the hell are you talking about osterfield, i went easy on you out of love." You pull out of the hug. "Just stop with this war already."

He laughs, "Alright, we will stop. But on one condition."

"What is it?

"The next time any of those idiots prank me, you'll help me getting back at them."

You laugh at his request "absolutely baby, you and I are a team."

"So it's a promise?"

"It's a promise"


	10. Halloween Night In

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Halloween night, you and Haz make things a little interesting for yourselves while staying in.

"You guys are seriously not coming to the party?" exclaims tom, wearing an incredibly elaborate Han solo costume. He looks at both of you in surprise, as you and his best friend Harrison stand in front of him in pyjamas, getting ready for your night in with movies and candies.

"Why do you sound so surprised? I thought we told you." Harrison passes the bewildered guy and goes into the kitchen to get more snacks, cause, you can never have enough snacks. You make the couch even more comfortable with the addition of blankets and pillows, while Tessa watches your actions with mild interest.

"I thought you guys were joking,"

"Thomas, we love you, but we were not joking about that. We've already been to three Halloween parties in the last week, all in very elaborate costumes. Now that the real day is here, we just want to stay in and watch movies. You explain, having been done with your couch project. You were right. In the last week, you've been to three Halloween parties. You guys had planned your costumes, going as things like wonder woman and Steve, meatball and spagetti, and even quite controversially, Edward and Bella. You don't really know why you picked the last costumes to be honest. Now that the original day is here, you just want to cuddle up to your boyfriend, and spend the night away watching movies.

Harrison come back with more snacks and organizes them on the table. seeing that you guys are REALLY not going, tom asks "well, what are you guys going to watch anyways? I know both of you don't like horror movies"

"That is exactly why we are not going to watch horror movies." Harrison smiles, "we are going to have the marathon of Hotel Transylvania."

"This is our way of rebelling against those who say that you can only watch horror movies on Halloween" you pipe up. The truth is that neither you, not Harrison liked watching horror movies. The last time you guys saw horror movies, both of you ended up hiding behind one another, and it wasn't even in a romantic way. So when you proposed staying in on Halloween and just watching movies, both of you agreed on Hotel Transylvania, it is perfect, cause it has Halloween feel to it, but it's not horror.

Realizing that he can't budge any of you, tom gives up. Collecting his keys and wallets, he leaves, "have fun, dorks" you hear the door slam shut behind him.

You guys start up the movie. Cuddled together, you go through two movies before taking a short break, when suddenly you say "you know when I said staying in and watching movies, I kind of meant making out?"

Harrison laughs, "you want to make out?"

"It's kind of a given isn't it?" You muse out! "I mean, staying in and not going to parties, watching movies, Halloween night and everything, it is mandatory that we make out. What stop laughing?" You hit Harrison on his shoulder, making him laugh even more.

"I can't help it. You're so cute when you're being cheeky" haz chokes out between his laughs.

"Well, I'm trying to be sexy right now, not cute." You sit back down, feeling a bit grumpy for bring laughed at. Harrison pulls you by your waist, closer to him. "Don't be angry love, I was only teasing" you can feel his breath on your neck, "you know I love it when you are being cheekier than me. It's kind of hot. Now are you going to be grumpier, or are we going to have that make out session you were thinking about?"

Hearing this you literally jump on his lap, going for his lips. The kiss starting out as fun, but gets more heated by the meaning. It would've turned into something more if you didn't hear the front door open and shut.

"the party got boring so I came back home, you guys mind if I..." tom stops when he sees you two in the middle of a make out, "ok I'm going to stop you guys right there. No couch sex while I'm home"

"So you mean we can have couch sex when you're far from home?" you shoot back smiling cheekily, while getting down from your boyfriend's lap reluctantly.

"Ha ha, real funny, I'm crashing your movie night now, only because I know you guys will definitely have sex here if I'm not here to stop you guys. But before, let me change out of this god awful costume." He strolls into his room.

"Your friend is a total cock-block you know." You whisper, feeling haz trailing his lips on your neck.

"Yeah I know, but he is here. So you think we can continue this later in our room?" Haz replies, evident he doesn't want to stop this.

"Oh, we are definitely going to continue this later" you say with a cheeky smile, stealing one last kiss, as you hear tom coming into the living room and finally settle down to watch the long forgotten movie.

"We are SO definitely continuing this later."


	11. Limelight Problems

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When you are in limelight, you are going to face problems. But are these problems worth it?

You knew the moment you met Harrison, that you were a goner. He was hot, and super charming, a dork at heart, and funny and super talented. You knew that you were going to fall in love with him on the first date. What you didn't anticipate was that he too was going to fall for you. And now, you guys were in a perfect relationship, as perfect as a relationship can be. You guys fought, sure, but made up and as soon as possible. The only problem was that, your relationship was not public.

Honestly, you didn't mind going public. What does it matter, all you wanted was to be with him. Going public meant that you guys won't have to hide anymore. You'll be able to go out together, only you two, not the entire group, you'd be able to hold hands in public. It didn't matter, you told him. All that mattered to you was being with him

Harrison knew the real story though. He knew that the moment you guys go public, you'll become a target for thousands of people who'll send you hate every day. He had experience, he knew what it meant to lead such a public life, and he wanted to protect you from it at all costs.

But it was hard for anyone to be in the Holland-Osterfield circle and remain anonymous. The fans knew you, they knew that you were good friends with the boys, and many did suspect that you and Haz were dating, but since they didn't have substantial proof, they were always shut down by the nicer part of the fandom who respected the boys and their privacy. But these speculations were enough for a lot of people to send you hate on various social media sites. You never read those, because what is the point? It's not going to benefit you in anyway. And you were not even public, so it was nothing.

However, all it took was one fan with her phone to catch you and Haz in a careless moment at a grocery store. You were talking about how porridge is absolutely the worst food for breakfast when Harrison had suddenly pulled you in for a kiss. after pulling away you had asked him what compelled him to kiss you all out in public, when he won't even hold your hand when out and about, he had just laughed and pulled you in for a hug, kissing the top of your hair. Unknown to you both, the entire interaction had been recorded, and within minutes was on instagram. The fans suddenly now had proof that you were dating Harrison. And now you were in the direct limelight.

Both your phones had blown up with notifications from various sources, all tagging you into different versions of the same video. What was a small moment of love and adoration for you guys was turned into a public fiasco. The fandom had broken into two factions, one supporting you and Harrison and your right to privacy, another one keen on breaking you both up, hating on you, and theorizing why you were with Harrison.

This was three months ago. In these three months, you've gained haters, as much as you've gained followers who love you. And most days you never cared what anyone said about you being with Harrison. But there is only a limit for every person's strength, and today you had reached your breaking point. The day was absolutely horrible. You were late to work, your boss yelled at you, your father whom you never talked to had called you only to insult and belittle you, when you told your mother, she had only told you to ignore him. And on top of all these, it seemed to you that you were receiving more and more hate every day. And the worst part was, you couldn't help but go through each and every hateful comments made on your posts, taking all of them to your heart.

And these are the reasons why when Harrison came back home, he found you in tears, on your bed, going through your instagram posts, reading all the hate. Seeing you like this broke his heart. He wanted to lash out at the haters, tell them off, but he knew that it'll only increase the amount of their hate for you. so instead of doing that, he slowly took away your phone, putting it on your night stand, before pulling you on his lap, completely enveloping you in his arms.

"It's fine, hey, look at me, it's fine." He gently rocks you back and forth, trying to console you. "Tell me, what's wrong?"

You were crying so hard that you were almost blind with tears. You recounted the entire day's events, how everyone in your life had decided on making you feel insignificant and succeeded, and that feeling of insignificance had only increased after reading all the hateful comments made by strangers on the internet.

"Maybe they are all right," you finally voiced what you have been thinking, "they don't know me, but they say the same things that people who know me say about me, and they are your fans, so they care about you, so maybe they are right. Maybe we shouldn't be together. You should be with someone better, prettier and smarter." You couldn't finish your sentence as the thought of leaving Harrison made you start crying again.

"Darling, firstly, anyone who really knows you has nothing but good things to say about you. Secondly you think they are saying these things because they care about me?" he asks gently, "they are saying these things because they are jealous. They are jealous of us, and you, for being the absolute perfection that you are. And that last bit, I never, ever want to hear you say that again." He kisses your temple, "I love you, and you love me, and that's all that matters okay? I don't care about the haters. Just know that I love you, and I want to be with you. Okay?" he asks you, adjusting you so that you were facing him, your arms around his neck, his arms around your waist.

You nod your head, "sorry for crying like a baby." You smile sheepishly, still not over the entire episode, but knowing that it'll be alright. He just shakes his head,

"You can always cry in front of me, no matter what. Also, you cry like a baby when we watch Disney movies anyways, so it's fine." He teases you, smiling at you.

"Hey, it was one time, and Moana's grandmother died, everyone is supposed to cry during that scene." You huff, a tiny bit offended.

"Yes, just like everyone is supposed to cry during Merida's speech at the end bit in Brave, and Mulan cutting her hair to take her fathers' place in the army, also when they show the fairy village for the first time in the first Tinker bell movie." He says with a straight face, earning a slap on his shoulder from you, making him laugh.

"Okay, fine so maybe there is one thing about me that should change."

"Oh no darling," he shakes his head, "I wouldn't change anything about you ever. You are just perfect."

You couldn't help but kiss him after this. You knew in your heart that this was not the last time hate was going to affect you like this, but you knew as long as Harrison was there, you'd be alright, always.


	12. Four Words, One Question

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nothing but fluff, and an important question

"Do you have to go?"

This was the question Haz had asked for the last two weeks. And for the last two weeks you had answered that yes, you had to.

"Babe, my sister is getting married, I have to go, you know that." You say, packing the last minute essentials. He looks at you with sad eyes. He would've come with you, but he had an audition, and three events coming up he couldn't miss.

"But, you guys have loads of cousins." He tries to reason, finally resorting to the lethal method of wrapping his arms around your waist, and burying his face in your hair. "They can help her with everything. Why do they have to take you away from me for three whole weeks? Also, what sort of wedding takes three weeks to arrange?" he knew he was sounding pathetic and desperate, but he couldn't help it, he hated being away from you.

You laugh a little, "Baby the wedding does not take three weeks, but we have to arrange a lot of things." Guessing what he was about to say next, "And no, my mum insists on the entire family pitching in to arrange the wedding. There's no way she'll leave it to an event manager to organize her daughter's wedding." Your mother was a traditionalist at heart who wanted the wedding of her eldest daughter to be organized by her family. Which meant you had to go back home for around three weeks.

"Well in that case when we get married, we are eloping, we'll just go to court and get married, and bother about traditional ceremony later." He mumbles, moving his face from your hair to your neck.

Your heart stopped beating for a second at the mention of wedding, because you guys have never really talked about anything like this. But the fact that he is giving this a little thought made you feel all sorts of butterfly in your stomach.

Soon enough it was time for you to leave. Even though you were coming back in three weeks, Haz acted like you were leaving him forever. Before going through security he tried for the last time to stop you.

"We won't even be able to talk to each other, you'll be too busy with wedding stuff, you'll probably forget me." He pouts at you hoping you'll stay.

You smile softly, "Bub, I'll never ever forget you. And we will talk every night, I promise." You give him a final kiss before going through the security and boarding the flight.

The three weeks you were away, were nothing short of hell for Harrison. Your shared apartment seemed too empty; the TV show you guys were watching together didn't seem interesting anymore. The books on your side of the night stand seemed lonely that no one was reading them. you guys talked for hours every night. But he missed you so fucking much. He missed you scooting closer to him when you guys got into bed because you were always cold; he missed your impromptu hugs. He missed you randomly asking for hugs, missed the way you helped him pick out his outfit and he helped you. He missed how you always started talking about random stuff. He missed the cuddles and waking up next to you, and the tickle fights. In brief he missed you a whole bunch.

Even though there was a lot of things to do for the wedding, too many relatives to catch up with, a hundred and one things to do, your mind will always wander back to him. The hustle and bustle of the house made you miss the quiet days you'd have with Haz, only you and him. You missed his laugh when you'd poke him on his sides. You missed how he always warmed you up. He gave the best cuddles, and he always hugged you tightly whenever you asked him. You missed how he would always ask you what you were reading and if he could read with you, and then will pull you onto his lap and you guys would read together. Not to mention, you always thought about his mention of marriage, and wondered whether he actually meant it or was is a passing comment. But at the end of the day you knew that you love your sister, and you love your family, but if you had the chance to fly back to London to be with Haz right now, you'd do it in a heartbeat.

The three weeks of separation finally over, Harrison waited eagerly to receive you at the airport. As soon as he spotted you, his face broke into a smile that only made your heart beat faster.

He pulled you into a tight hug as soon as you were within his reach and started kissing you all over your face, making you giggle. Suddenly he stopped and held your face between his hands, and looked you deep into your eyes, "I missed you so fucking much, never leave again." He says before pulling you into a deep kiss that left you breathless.

After getting back to the apartment, you take a shower and change into your pyjamas, wanting nothing but to take a nap. But coming out of the bathroom, you find a very nervous Harrison standing in the middle of the bedroom.

"Haz, what are you doing?"

"Oh, hey!" he looked at you nervously. "Listen, uh, we need to talk." Hearing these three words were enough for you to get anxious. For you, these words never lead to anything good.

"What is it?" you ask carefully, praying to the gods that he was not about to break up with you.

"Well, I, uh..." he seemed a little lost for words. "uh, shit, sorry, it's just, these past three weeks I've thought about it a lot, and, uh, I was going to ask you this tonight during dinner, but," he takes something out of his pocket, something that looks suspiciously like a box for engagement ring. He starts going down on one knee, but you stop him.

"Are you going to ask me what I think you are going to ask me?"

"Will you marry me?" he asks simply, without any flourish, or extra words of endearment. Just the simple four word question was enough to make you laugh and cry at the same time.

"Yes, a thousand times yes" you pull him upright by hand and kiss him, a kiss filled with all the love you have for him. You couldn't believe it was happening, you were going to marry the boy you love, it made you so happy, that it hurts. 

"And we are not going to bother with the traditional stuff, I just want you to be mine and that's it." He says pulling away from the kiss.

Still not over the initial shock, you smile, "baby, you'll have to fight my mother on that I believe. But I don't care. I just want you to be mine." You kiss him again and then some more. You knew that your mom and his mom as well, would want to make it a proper wedding, but right now all you wanted to do was to kiss the boy; after all, there were three weeks worth of kisses to catch up to. 


	13. A friend in need

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's nothing better than having a friend when you need them the most.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: mention of emotional abuse and cursing

Even though it was not your fault, it hurt. Knowing that the guy you loved was only using you while having an affair with another girl. Three years you gave him, three years of your life, and he just used you for those three years. You still remember his last words,

"you're just great at, you know emotional support, a great fuck too, but I dated you only cause you're easy to manipulate, to get whatever I want from you."

Now that you see it, you knew that he was right. The three years you were with him, he took almost everything. He took money; he called you up at god forsaken hours at night just so you could pick him up from wherever the hell he decided to get drunk at. He would take out all his negative emotions on you. And the worst of all, he took away your family too. They think that it's your fault that you guys broke up. They love him so much, that they are blind to the fact that he put you through mental and emotional abuse for three years.

Now you were left to pick up the pieces. You didn't know what to do or where to go, you had isolated yourself so much from everyone because you thought they were jealous of you, when in reality, they were telling the truth when they told you that the guy was bad news. You had insulted them, or cut all ties with them, because you thought you were in love. And the worst part was, you did the same with your best friend. 

You were hoping to god that she hadn't changed her number when she moved away. You didn't know why you were calling her, but, you knew she was the only person who won't mock you on your situation.

And you were right. As soon as you heard her voice on the phone, you broke down. She didn't have to be told, she just knew. All she said was that you're leaving your city and coming to stay with her. You didn't know how you felt about that, but you knew that you'll never be able to get your normal life back in your city. So you left. Moved to another city, another continent, hoping that you'll leave behind all the bad memories as well.

This all was five months ago. You've been in London for five months. Sure you've succeeded in getting a job, your daily routine was of a normal person who ate, slept, and talked, but inside you felt hollow. You felt as if it was entirely your fault. You were stupid, and shallow, thinking you were in love. The entire notion of love now made you nervous, disgusted and panicked at the same time. And the fact that your best friend kept pushing you to date again didn't help at all.

"Come one, you have to put yourself out there," it was another evening of watching movies and eating whatever you felt like. Honestly you'd rather do this than go out.

'I don't want to."

"Yes you do." Your friend holds your face, "look at me, you think your douchbag of an ex is pining for you? No, he is out there fucking other girls." Her voice gets softer seeing you flinch at her words. "I'm not saying do some serious dating stuff. But you can just you know, see what's out there. Let me tell you, that Brit boys are super fine." She winks at you.

You only shake your head. You knew that you were not being logical with all this. You knew that your ex was an asshole, but that didn't mean you didn't love him. You did, and knowing that love was never reciprocated, hurt.

"Okay, fine," she huffs in annoyance. "Will it help if I tell you that one of my friends has a major crush on you and was asking me whether it's okay if he asks you out?"

"What?" your mind was somewhere else, so you didn't know what the hell she was going on about.

"You know, the guy you met last week, at the party we went?" you try to remember, but came up blank. "Blonde, a bit tall, blue eyes, goes by the name Harrison?"

Now that she mentioned the name you remember. Yes, Harrison, he was a good looking guy, sweet too, from the little conversation you had with him. It made you wish that you were not a complete mess and could go out with him like any normal girl. 

Seeing the recognition on your face she continues "Idk what you guys were talking about that night, but girl, he is totally smitten. He was asking for your number, and if you'd go out with him, I told him that I'll ask you. So what do you think? Should I give him your number?"

"No. Tell him you didn't get a chance to ask me." You get up from the couch, "I'm going to bed." Rushing to your room, you shut the door before her protests could reach your ears.

You didn't know why you were so freaked out, but you were. Somewhere in your mind, you were responsible for whatever has happened to you, or so you thought. You knew it had damaged you, maybe beyond repair. And as much as you wanted to go out with Harrison, you couldn't. Partially because you felt that he deserved better, he didn't need your drama in his life, and partially because you were scared of history repeating itself.

Your friend, however did the exact opposite of what you told her to. She knew she should'nt have, she should mind her business. But she hated seeing you like this. She hated the fact that an asshole like your ex left you like this. So she did the thing which would probably make you kill her.

"Look, you can't tell her that I told you anything." Your friend finishes telling Harrison everything. She knew she was going to hell for it, but she had to. You'd never come out of this on your own, and you were not letting anyone else help you either. 

Harrison couldn't believe the entire thing. He didn't know how anyone can treat someone like you this way. The first time he saw you, he was intrigued, and when he talked to you, he was completely hooked. He wanted more, wanted to get to know you more, so he had asked your best friend for your number. But now that he had heard the entire story, all he wanted to do was to find your ex and beat him to bloody pulps for treating you like this.

"Okay, I won't tell." That's all he could say. He didn't know what else to do. So he decided not over thinking this. He would know what to do when he saw you.

That moment came soon enough, when you guys stumbled onto each other in another party. You greeted him warmly, without any idea about the fact that he knows what happened. He on the other hand knew that the moment he saw you again, that he had to talk to you.

"Hey, can we talk?" as soon as those words left his mouth; you knew what it was about. You knew that he was probably going to ask you out, and you dreaded the fact that you'd have to let him down. You liked him, but your fears would never let you have what you wanted.

As the doors to the bedroom closed, you turned to him nervously. You didn't even know this guy and now you were in a bedroom with him? But he kept his distance by standing near the door while you stood near the bed. He didn't make any move to get closer to you, but before he opened his mouth to say what he wanted to say, you stopped him.

"Look, I know what you want to say, and I'm flattered, but I don't think it is a good idea." You pause for a little, looking at his not-so-convinced face, not knowing what to say to convince him of the level of disastrousness the idea of him going out with you belonged to. "I don't know what you're looking for, but it's obviously not me." You hope it would be enough, but your heart sank a little when you saw him advance towards you.

"I'm not asking you out." He said, taking a seat on the end of the bed, and patting the space beside him. You take a seat, keeping some distance. "Honestly, I don't know what happened to you. But I know that something did happen, and that is why you don't want to go out with me. And that's fine." He didn't tell you that he really knew what happened, because after all, he made a promise. "But that does not mean that we can't be friends." he looked at you with all sincerity. 

"Why are you assuming that anything happened?" the fact that he had hit so close to the home with his assumption, scared you. For a moment you thought maybe your best friend had blabbed to him. But what Harrison said next made sure that this was not the case.

"No, she didn't tell me anything." He confirmed, knowing the conclusion you were reaching to. "She told me that there is a reason why you don't want to date anyone, or go out with anyone, but she didn't tell me what really happened." He went on, "but I just, want you to know that I didn't ask for your number or wanted to ask you out because I wanted to get in your pants or anything, I just really wanted to get to know you, and I like talking to you. So I was hoping that, instead of going out, we can be friends?"

You didn't know what to say. You knew this was going to get problematic, especially for you. But you wanted this. And the fact that he was looking at you with those piercing blue eyes full of hope, didn't help either. 

"No guy ever wants to be just friends with a girl" you shake your head.

"You're right. I don't want to be just friends with you." he smiles "I want to go out with you, hold your hand, kiss you randomly when you are talking, watch movies under the same blanket, go to sleep next to you and wake up in the morning next to you." he looked at the floor, and then looked up back at you again "But that's not what you need. Right now, you need a friend. So I'm going to be your friend. If you'll let me?"

Once again you were at lost. The way he said everything, your heart yarned for those things. But you knew now was not the time. And in time you could still see yourself with him, doing these things. But you still had questions.

"And what if i fall for someone else?" you asked quietly, your voice merely a whisper.

"I'll still be your friend." He raises his hands, his fingers slightly grazing your cheekbones, before he let his hands fall on his lap.

"Ok." you find yourself complying. He got upfrom the bed and held out his hands for you to take, dragging back to the partywhen you took his hand. You knew it was selfish of you. you knew it was wrongfor him. But after a long time you wanted to let someone in, and it felt good.So it couldn't be that wrong. Could it? 


	14. Dumpling Love

"Okay, so how do I do this?" Harrison looked at you helplessly, all the ingredients scattered on the kitchen table in front of him. you two had gone on a very interesting grocery run when he found out that you wanted to make dumplings for quite some times but didn't have time to. Since he loves to cook, he decided he wants to learn from you, and insisted that you guys make dumplings for dinner. And now with all the ingredients to make the perfect dumpling, he only waited for your direction.  
"It's very simple. Watch." You walk him through the steps to making the filling. Which is basically taking all the ingredients sans the wrappers and putting them in a bowl and mixing it well by hand. Once you were done, you see him pout a little.  
"I wanted to do that!" he says, making you laugh.  
You laugh at his expression, "yeah well it was the easy part, now we come to the interesting one. Making the actual dumplings." You point towards the store bought dumpling wrappers you got. Harrison wanted to make them at home, but you knew how hard it was to make them. So you forced him to get the store bought ones.  
You had to admit it was really cute to see him get so excited about cooking, despite the number of disasters he had in the kitchen. For your six month anniversary, he tried to cook dinner, and was successful in the attempt until you arrived at the apartment and forgot the chicken in the oven. You guys had Chinese takeout for that date; though it was partially you fault as well, after all you were the one he was making out with while the chicken burned.  
"Okay, so how do we wrap this bad boys?" he snaps you out of your train of thought, raising a quizzical brow at you. You couldn't help it, there he was, wearing a pink apron, hair all mussed up, determined face as if he is going to war; it was Friday night, and instead of going out and partying all night, there he was, making dumplings with you.  
You shake your head, "yeah, right, so you scoop them up with spoons like this," you show him the neat little trick of scooping up the filling with two spoons like your grandma taught you, "you put this baby in the blanket," you carefully put the filling on the wrapper, "wet the blanket, tuck and tuck and tuck, and press, and voila, the baby went to sleep." You show him the pleating technique, his careful eyes following the quick movements of your fingers.  
"Why are you calling them babies?" he laughs at your commentary while making the dumplings, carefully placing them basket used to steam them.  
"My grandma taught me to make these when I was little, and she would make a story about each dumpling, where they came from, and their names. It was really funny and sweet. Also, kept the tiny me interested in it." You smile fondly at the memory of your grandma.  
He smiles at you and then turns his concentration at the job in his hands, which was not going well at all.  
"Mine looks like a five year old made them." He laughs seeing yours and his works stand side by side on the plates.  
"Nah babe, at five years old, I made better dumplings." You laugh at his outrageous expression.  
"Come on, I'm trying okay." He takes another wrapper. "I'm going to do this one right." He concentrates really hard, too hard in fact, and the wrapper breaks. "Oh for fucks sake."  
"Come here." You pull him in for a hug before kissing him.  
"What was that for? Not that I'm complaining." He bumps your nose with his, smiling down at you.  
"You are absolutely adorable you know that?" you answer, pecking his lips again. "And one of the things I love about you is how much you love to cook even though you are not really good at it." At this his expression turns into mock anger.  
"How dare you, I'll have you know I'm an excellent chef." You roll your eyes and point at the broken dumpling. "That was just one bad baby who had to be punished." He says, before cleaning it up, "okay, let's do it, dumpling show down, you vs. me. Whoever wins gets to be the dumpling king, or queen."  
"You're on Osterfield." You both begin working on the dumplings, yours turning into beautifully wrapped pretty looking ones, whereas his turned out to be what your grandma would've referred to as, 'farm workers of dumpling world.'  
"You know at the end of the day it's the taste that matters," Harrison says as the dumplings come out of the steamer. The ones you made looked perfect, glossy and beautiful. His dumplings on the other hand looked a little battered up after their time in the steamer.  
"Nope, admit it, I win, you lose. I'm the dumpling queen." You laugh at his expression of defeat. He does a little bow in front of you,  
"Okay, my dumpling queen, what is your wish?" he laughs as you pretend to think.  
"Hmm, my wish is to devour these babies." You say before taking one and pretending to feed him, only to pop it in your mouth at the last moment. It soon turned into "who can eat most amount of dumplings'. This dumpling making however, became your monthly tradition, one of your most loved things to do with Harrison.


	15. Mistletoe Kisses

Waking up in the morning, the day after Halloween has always been a little sad to you. All that anticipation for something, the festive mood, the waiting, it excited you, but after Halloween came and went, you always felt a little lost. A lot of people would start preparing for Christmas, but you were not one of those people. Sure you loved Christmas, but preparing for it from November 1st seemed to be a little too extra for you.

Harrison is the polar opposite of you in this case. That boy loves winter, and he loves Christmas. He would swap his Halloween costume with a Santa hat and Christmas themed sweater at 12:01 am on November 1st. The rest of the time up until December 25th, he spends preparing for Christmas. He is the guy who would have his gifts shopping done by the last week of November, "you have to shop early to get the best gifts for everyone." He would always say. Not to mention, in his definition of "Osterfield-Christmas" everyone must get more than one gift. You thought he was a bit extra when it comes to Christmas, you loved it, but you were not going to tell him about it.

This year on November 1st you woke up to the smell of waffles; Haz had recently found a really good recipe for waffles, and he would make them every day. Walking into the kitchen, you find him making the second batch of waffles, wearing his- 'kiss the Santa' apron. The apron had been a gag gift from you last Christmas, but he loved it and only started wearing it when he was feeling Christmassy!

"Seriously Haz?" you groan at the sight of his apron. "it's not even November properly yet, and you are wearing your Christmas apron?" you do realize that even the carved pumpkins outside have not dried out yet!"

"I can't hear you over the sounds of sleigh-bells my love." He says, blissfully ignoring your words. "Christmas is here" he puts a plateful of waffles and bacon in front of you. "Also, we are going shopping."

Shoveling food in your mouth, you chew for a while before replying "I swear to god if you say we are going Christmas shopping I would beat you up with a Christmas tree."

"Look at you getting your holiday spirits on!" he laughs, taking off his apron "but no, this is not Christmas shopping. It's one of my friend's birthday and I need to buy him a present" he kisses your head, "get ready, we leave after you finish eating." And with that, he walks out of the kitchen, humming a Christmas carol under his breath.

You shake your head at him. the way he got excited for Christmas was really adorable. You quickly finish your breakfast, before getting ready, excited to spend an entire day with Harrison. You knew that he was going to sneak in some Christmas shopping, but you didn't really mind though.

The entire ride, Haz played songs that were low-key Christmas themed. You knew that he was doing it to get any reaction out of you, but you were not going to give him that satisfaction. So you sang along to the songs, him laughing at your bad singing. He knew he had to up the ante on his Christmas celebration a little; he loved it when you made jokes about him getting excited about Christmas. However, he never bought it when you said that Christmas doesn't excite you, since you found out at age ten that Santa is not real; he had seen your enthusiasm when it was time to decorate the tree and the house. He knew you loved Christmas as much as him. And he loved that about you.

During the entire time you guys were shopping, Haz tried to sneakily buy some Christmas stuff, and decoration. You caught him though, but you couldn't stop him, cause every time you caught him buying something Christmassy, he would just flash a smile at you and you'll be gone.

Walking back to the car is when you realized that it was in fact a Christmas shopping and he had gotten a few presents for his family and friends. Not only gifts, but he also had gotten decorations and light. And judging by his enthusiasm you know he wants to put them up as soon as he gets home.

After getting home, he sorts out the resents before sitting down with the decorations. He carefully unwraps the small glass decorations that are meant for the tree. He also got a few little pieces here and there. And lights, so many lights, you were sure you could wrap it around your entire apartment.

"you think we should put up the lights?" he asks, looking around the apartment.

"Haz, it's November 1st, don't you dare start putting up Christmas decorations." You say warningly, knowing if left unsupervised, he will put up all the decorations.

"But why?" he asks incredulously, not understanding what you may have against pretty lights.

"if you put up decorations this early, then by the time Christmas actually rolls around, it will get old and have nothing special about it." You say gently, wrapping your arms around his waist as he stands in the middle of the living room, pouting a little. "you can start putting up decorations from 1st December, I promise." You tell him, hoping he will stop pouting.

"fine." He starts putting away the decorations, a bit defeated that he didn't get his way with it this time. But he will find a way, he always does.

It was going to be a quiet day. None of you had anything specific to do, except for meeting up with your best friend in the evening. You asked Haz if he wanted to come with you, but he said that he had something else to do. Not thinking much of it, you went out, while he set up for his plans. He knew that there is no way he can put up Christmas decorations now. But he can do one small thing.

Coming back home, you rummage your purse for keys, realizing you have in fact forgotten them. so you knock on the door, hoping Haz is home. And fortunately for you, he was. He opens the door, a wide smile forming on his face seeing you.

"hey babe!" he pulls you into a warm hug. But as soon as you enter and try to pull off your shoes, he pulls you back towards the threshold, right under the door.  
"Haz, what are you doing? Close the door." You say, not really understanding what he is doing.

"look at that" he points upwards, a cheeky little smile gracing his features.

"Mistletoe" you look at the sprig of green before feeling him lean in for a kiss, the kiss lasts a long minute before you both pull apart. "I thought I told you no Christmas decoration before December?" you laugh as you pull him towards the living room, seeing that he has a mistletoe placed at every doorway in the house.

"ah! But love, they bring good luck to and happiness." He again pulls you into a kiss at the threshold of the kitchen door, the mistletoe hanging right above your head.  
"and you believe that?" you snort in laughter.

"no, but it's fun to kiss under them." he laughs. He had in fact gotten his way. he had also put up some small decoration here and there in the apartment. But they escaped your notice. Or so he thought. You noticed them right away but didn't have the heart to tell him off. So you feigned ignorance towards the Santa figurine on the mantle.

"you are incorrigible you know that?" you say laughingly again as he steals another kiss walking out of the kitchen. To be honest, you didn't really mind the mistletoe, it'll be nice to have a reason to kiss him. not that you need one anyway.


	16. The Game

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It is a game of strip poker, and you're happily losing at it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chapter includes smut. read at your own discretion.

It was going to be an easy game to win, or so you thought.

You had suggested the game of strip poker confidently because you knew that you were good at poker. You always won no matter what. But what you didn't anticipate was Harrison being better at it than you.

"ooh, that was another round sweetheart, that means another piece of clothing." Haz smiles at you innocently, even though you knew it was bullshit. You always thought of him to be the good and innocent and nice one in the relationship, what you didn't realize was that he could be more mischievous and wicked than you.

Sighing, you take off your socks, having already lost your shirt before; you were left in your jeans, and a bra, a very delicate and lacy number you picked out so that later in the night you could tease Harrison, but the tables were soon turning on you.

"ready for another round baby?" haz asks as he deals another round of cards. Even though the idea of strip poker had been yours, your mind wandered off into different paths and you didn't want to play anymore.

"baby, how about we ditch the game and do something more interesting?" you asked, almost whined, trying to get up from where you were sitting opposite to him.  
"oh no babygirl, we are not doing that!" haz almost growled. He never had this kind of chance and now that he did, he was not going to lose it. You were too much of a tease, and sometimes it frustrated him to no end, and when he tried to tease you, somehow you always turned it around on him. This time, however, the reins were in his hands, and he was not going to let go.

Two more rounds, and now you were sitting only in your panties in front of a fully clothed Harrison, whose excitement was clearly evident through his pants. But he was dealing the cards for the next round, and you were getting frustrated, feeling tingly, and anxious and excited altogether,  
"Baby, please." You whined, "we already know I am going to lose, so let's just get to the good part."

"Nope, remember all the times you tease me? This is me getting back on you. Now sit there and play the next round like a good girl." He says sternly. Honestly, you've never heard him talk like this and you kind of liked it.

The outcome of the third round was not a surprise at all, you lost, or maybe you wanted to lose. In any case, you didn't even care anymore. Throughout the entire game, all you wanted was Harrison's hands on you, and now that the game was over, it finally was time. You get up from where you were sitting and go over to haz and straddle his lap. He sets one of his hands on your hips and another one cupping your jaw. As you lean in to kiss him, he slides his hands from your face to your hair and pulls your head back lightly.

"impatient are we?" he says as he slides another hand slowly from your hips to your thighs, then back up again to grab one of your breasts and squeeze it a little, all the while his lips skimmed your jaw to your neck, and then right below your ear, kissing and sucking with enough enthusiasm to leave a mark.

You whimper at the contact. You had to admit that this side of Harrison was only turning you on more. You needed him to do something but he was acting as if he had all the time in the world.

"Haz, baby please," you moan out as he starts kissing down your jawline to the top of your chest. "I need you," you whine a little, which only makes him stop in his tracks.

"hmm, but this is more fun isn't it?" he resumes his ministrations on your neck, his fingers toying with your nipple. You grind your hips with him, wanting to feel more friction, only to be stopped by his other hand, that held onto your hips fast, making sure you don't move at all. "Not here." He wraps your legs around his waist and picks you up, walking into the bedroom, gently dropping you on the bed.

As he leans down to kiss you, you quickly take off his shirt, leaving him in his jeans. He pushes you onto your shoulder, his lips making way down your body, pausing at your breasts. He takes time, licking and sucking each nipple as if he has all the time in the world. Meanwhile, his touches have you panting, moaning, and whining, wanting more. But he keeps holding on.

"now now, what does my kitten want?" he makes his way back up to your ears, tenderly kissing the side of your face and neck. One hand playing with your breast, while another hand makes an achingly long way down towards your now dripping core; you arch your back, wanting his hands there, only for him to avoid it and grabbing your ass, giving it a playful squeeze.

Breathless, you look at his face, his eyes dark with lust, a playful smirk gracing his lips that takes your breath away. As much as you liked this side of him, you were beyond frustrated now.

"i want you in me. Please haz." Your back arches into his hand that was playing with your breasts, as he pinches your nipples. He ducks his head down to suck onto them, his hand down south finally moving towards your core.

"ooh, princess you are so wet. Is this all for me?" he asks, his hands rubbing through your folds, teasing your entrance. He makes his way down your body, peppering kisses everywhere he can reach, hovering above your core just for a second, before latching onto your clit and sucking on it. The contact that you've been waiting for the entire night.

His mouth on you almost has you crying on relief. His tongue laps up your moisture, working on all the right places. The tension slowly building up in your stomach, your back arching up, your hands pulling at his golden curls. Harrison knows your tells, he knows when you are about to come. And to your disappointment, just when you were about to reach the edge, he stopped, pulling back, and looking at you.

"why'd you stop?" you whine, wanting his, your hands make way to your clit, rubbing at it until his hands stop yours.

"not yet darling." He teases, kissing your mouth before shedding the rest of his clothes. His member stands to attention, you wrap your hands around it, hearing him moan above you. pulling you in for a kiss, he makes you lie down, letting go of him, reaching into the nightstand he pulls out a condom, wrapping him up. He lines up with your core, before thrusting into you, making you both moan.

You cry out incoherent words holding onto him for dear life as he pumps in and out of you, grunting and moaning at the feel of you around him. "shit babe, you are so tight." He almost growls in your ear before kissing you hard, pulling at your lower lip with his teeth. You're pretty sure that at this point even your neighbors are awake due to your combined yells and moans of pleasure. But all you cared about right now is how good Harrison made you feel.

Soon enough you could feel the tension building up in your stomach, you'd probably die if you don't orgasm this time, and thankfully for you, Haz didn't seem to ease up, if anything, his thrusts became sloppy, and rough, chasing his own high. Your hands balled up the sheets on both of your sides, finally tipping behind that edge, where you could only see stars behind your eyelids. The ecstasy was too intense that you almost miss Harrison's moans of pleasure as he reaches his own release, twitching inside of you. Breathing roughly, he collapses on you, nuzzling his face on the crook of your neck.

"we should play poker more often." He mumbles against your neck. Making you both laugh. Oh, boy were you going to play this game again, but you had plans to turn the table on him this time.


End file.
